Tip #1: have your home showcase the things that mean the most.
When we first moved to Los Angeles, just over two years ago, we hardly had any material possessions. We packed our Jeep and drove from Minneapolis to LA, and I was not quite 14 weeks pregnant with Maxwell. We brought with us an heirloom baby cradle, my sewing machine, a box of sewing notions/fabric, minimal clothes, a small selection of meaningful items/decorations, Bauer’s dog crate, and plenty of tools should the Jeep need any servicing. We actually planned on sleeping in the Jeep on our drive out here, but as we were selling/packing/cleaning out the house we were renting in Minneapolis I found more and more things I just couldn’t leave behind. We had never made a move this large or far away and didn’t quite know what to expect. (Our families have the rest of our valuables and meaningful items stored in Michigan.) Suddenly the Jeep was full of “absolute musts” to bring to Los Angeles, so there wasn’t room for sleeping (or packing much else).
Funny, we didn’t bring more than a few boxes of stuff, but what we did bring took up a lot of space in the Jeep.
As hard as it’s been, I’ve learned over the last 25 months that it really is possible to live with less.
It’s an incredibly emotional process — especially how we’re indirectly trained to become attached to things — but it’s taught me so much.
Once we found our first apartment in Los Angeles we started making small purchases for our home. Of course all of this took lots of time, lots of saving, and a lot of discipline to not spend money on unnecessary things.
There are still things and clothes and furniture I think we need that we haven’t purchased yet, and the reason why has mixed results. Do we really need this? Can we afford it? And so we continue wait.
I remember clear as day showing a friend our first apartment after we had settled in. She saw our closet and then asked me, Where are the rest of your clothes? I thought to myself, They’ve been sold. And for a minute I actually felt embarrassed over my small wardrobe.
But that’s a perfect example of how we live with less, and how it’s been a discipline not to make a purchase “just because”.
Living with less shouldn’t feel weird or wrong. In fact, it’s actually taught me a lot about myself and personal tendencies. I’ve learned how to decorate our home with our favorite, most-cherished things instead of packing them away “for another time”.
When we display memories of our adventures, or make space in our cozy home for things that have value, we re-ignite life moments that once made our souls feel something. And how inspiring is that?
I’ve been trained to look at the big picture in life instead of a small, Maggie-centered life. Because of what we put inside our home, when I walk outside I actually notice the beautiful pink flowers growing on the branches. I rocked our firstborn to sleep in a cradle that once rocked me, and once again it’s in the nursery, anticipating another baby. My nightstand holds a bird lamp, a gift from my parents — one that “I really really really realllly wanted” about seven years ago. One kitchen cupboard shelf — which was once empty, is now full of coffee cups given to us by family & friends. They each tell a story of adventure and friendship in California. The bed quilts inside our closet hold meaning and are handmade, and the books on our bookshelf are incredibly inspiring, funny or from our very favorite authors.
My point is our home may be small but it’s incredibly large with meaning, and that brings me deep happiness.
Maggie,
I just want to say thank you for your positivity, good spirit, creativity, (and that hair tho ;) I just lost my job about a month ago and it is really, really hard. Not only financially, but emotionally as well. Your positivity and light shine through and I REALLY THANK YOU for being you. xoxo, Sarah
Hi Sarah, there was a season about six years ago where Zack and I were both unemployed while living in Detroit. On paper the math didn’t “add up”, but through prayer and positivity we were able to pay all of our bills. I know this is a hard season to be in. Thank you for taking a minute to leave a comment, it means so much :)
Hi Sarah, we have just come out of a season of unemployment. My husband was out of a full time job for 3 1/2 years. It was Extremely hard, but we managed to hold on to our home and pay our bills. You find out that most of the things you want are not what you need. Hold on to Hope and pray continually. I wish you the best as you search for a new job.
I love this! My husband and I just moved out of our teeny tiny apartment into a house (it was hard to fit the two of us and a baby without feeling cramped) and it feels absolutely huge. Despite having all the space, though, I’ve been whittling down our collection of stuff. I already pared my wardrobe down to about 30 pieces that I absolutely love and it’s liberating. This has inspired me to downsize even more. All those boxes in our house that still haven’t been unpacked yet… what if I don’t actually need that stuff? Thank you for your post.
I just had a thought, perhaps you moving into this house (which feels “absolutely huge”) is an opportunity for your family to welcome others in on a regular basis. Maybe you host a weekly dinner group where everyone attending brings a dish to pass. Maybe it’s a bible study, a moms group or craft night. Or maybe this is something you already do and so it’s affirmation to continue on!
I think it’s OK for us to welcome the gift of a spacious home, perhaps something greater is to come from it. Thanks for your comment Robin :)
Thanks! That’s a great suggestion. I’ve never really had room to entertain before, but now that I do, I’d love to have more people over. Only thing is I’m a bit embarrassed about our super dated kitchen that we don’t have the budget to upgrade quite yet. But I shouldn’t let that hold me back, should I? If the atmosphere is friendly and loving, the scratched up stained laminate counters won’t really matter!
The Nester talks about using “arrows” in decorating to distract us. Maybe would work for your kitchen? :)
http://www.thenester.com/2014/02/arrows-a-secret-weapon-in-decorating.html
A great reminder, thank you!
Oh, I needed this post! Hubby and I live in a tiny one bedroom apartment and are expecting a precious little girl in January! We will be moving out of state{Michigan to New York} in the spring{with a 3 month old baby- eek!}, so I’ve been paring everything down to the essentials! Its amazing how much stuff we just have… I mean, so much that has no meaning whatsoever! I’ve definitely been working on priorities!!
Thanks so much for sharing this!!! <3
p.s. do you "entertain" much in your apartment? got any tips on that? {maybe Im getting ahead of you… ^_^}
We do! And I have my girlfriends and their kiddos over often as well. I think my best advice is not aplogizing for the small space (although most living in LA have a small apartment) and then doing as much prep beforehand as possible! :)
Oh yes… apologizing… hmm… definitely needed that one! ^_^ and I’ll also be working on the prep ahead of time!!! Thanks so much!!
We are currently living in Okinawa and left many of our possessions behind. We are a family of 6, soon to be 7 and are learning how to live in a small space and with very minimal stuff. I think God is teaching us we don’t need many material possessions. It has been a process and I hope I can show that to my children. It will be a shock when we return to the states at all the overwhelming abundance. Thanks for this post!
I love this tip and am looking forward to the rest of the series. I go in cycles of just feeling overwhelmed by all the stuff in my life and I go through and purge. This happens every few months. I’m finally getting to the point that I feel like the I’m starting to be in control of the stuff instead of the stuff controlling me. It is so liberating to feel comfortable in our space because it’s not cluttered by unnecessary things. We still have a way to go but we’re getting there. Through this process my mentality has changed from “when we move into a bigger house…” to “how can we make our home (which is more than adequate for our family of four) serve our needs better.” I can honestly say now that I never want a larger home than what we have and I would entertain the idea of a smaller home if we were to change cities/states.
Also, the things that have stayed through the purging are, like you said, the things with meaning. There are quilts on each bed in our home that I’ve made. The decorations on our walls and shelves are treasures acquired on our travels that hold special memories. Our holiday decorations are minimal and handmade. Quality and meaning over quantity any day!
I love what you said about how it shouldn’t feel wrong. You’re so right about that. Something I’m adopting more and more in my life. Less excess, more Jesus. He’ll show you what matters.
Yes :) and my guess is our burdens will be lightened, too. XO
I’ve been lurking your blog for a while now, hehe! And I wanted to say how much I love your apartment living and “meaningful” decorating posts. I can so relate! When my husband and I were first married, our apartment was a studio that was seriously less than 100sq. feet in Santa Monica. I’m not sure who said it, but we adopted the mantra of “is it useful? Is it beautiful? Do we love it? And do we truly NEED this?” If an item fit that description, it was ok to keep. The philosophy really made our little place peaceful and cozy. A real home.
Now we’re in a spare bedroom at my in-laws (with our 16 month-old boy!) after a job loss. I’m navigating this feeling of missing our “things” but being so grateful we have somewhere to live… I guess I need to get our wedding photos and handmade blankets out of storage now to make it more like “ours”! Those small touches do so much. Thanks for the inspiration and positivity when it comes to cultivating a happy place for ourselves again.