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You are here: Home / inspiration / Can you ask yourself this question?

Can you ask yourself this question?

May 1, 2017 · 10 Comments

While visiting a friend’s house the other morning, she offered make two cups of coffee. (Of course I said yes.) In between sips and checking in our our many children, we talked about writing (how is it going?) and getting up early to read (what are you studying?). And then she asked me why I wasn’t writing more, listing off a few possible options for perhaps why I’ve slowed. And as I thought about my reason, the point of why I write in the first place, I realized I didn’t have a good answer. All I had were excuses.

And so, with a single “why” question, a spark has been dropped on the flame.

– – –

My day could be going extremely well (thank you, Lord!), or it could feel extremely challenging (help me, Lord!); it really doesn’t matter, I ask myself the same question multiple times a day.

Why do I do what I do?

I could tally how many times I’ve asked myself this just this year, but I think the visual would be too much to bear. (Snort.)

No one wants to see how much I’m struggling, we’re struggling, with a few specific things.

Or, do they?

– – –

It doesn’t bother me to share my struggles. Perhaps it’s because I’m really bad at hiding my feelings? Anytime a friend asks me how I’m doing, I can’t help but answer honestly. Sometimes it catches us off guard, other times we both knew it was coming.

Quiet possibly, the best thing I have done for myself since 2013 is admit I have postpartum depression and seek help. Why didn’t I do that sooner, instead of waiting until last summer? Well, I’m not sure, but I do know that because I sought help I can snap out of my low moments so much faster.

Quality, sister-like friendships have been essential for me since becoming a mother. Especially since becoming a mother of three children in three years! I need women in my life who can pour into me — and I need to pour into them, too! I want friends who can teach me how to cook, and I want friends who will let me teach them my favorite cooking tips. I want friends who will listen to me lament over the same story, different verse, and never grow weary of helping me carry my burdens. And I want to help them carry theirs. I want friendships where we can ask challenging questions, adventure together, and celebrate our milestones.

Why do we do what we do?

Why do we come back to our habits, the recipes, our personal style, our interest in house plants, that quirky decoration we deem perfect for a plant? What is the point of making time for our hobbies, the work we choose to do, the way we mother, the fact that we enjoy being mothers?

A few weeks ago my small group was asked to fast. And while fasting implies food, I knew in my heart it would mean the most if I fasted from social media. And instead of doing this for just 6 hours or 12 hours or an entire day, I fasted for three whole days. And it was lovely! I learned so much about my habits and my emotions and what I truly feel is important.

Remember to ask, what is the point?

For me: to learn, to love, to be hospitable, to encourage, to remember, to laugh deeply and hug dearly, to disciple.

How about for you?

(Related: if you don’t know the point, maybe you should stop doing it?)

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May 1, 2017 · Filed Under: inspiration · 10 Comments

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Comments

  1. Cindy says

    May 1, 2017 at 10:04 am

    I LOVE your blog, your courage to share your Mom heart and struggles, and sending hugs and strength your way! ♥You are a great Mom and bring strength to many with your words! :)

    Reply
    • Maggie Whitley says

      May 2, 2017 at 1:23 pm

      Thank you, Cindy! It’s wonderful to hear from you :)

      Reply
  2. Jordan says

    May 1, 2017 at 3:09 pm

    Agreed. And, I want those friendships too <3

    Reply
    • Maggie Whitley says

      May 2, 2017 at 1:24 pm

      Girl, you need to start a Kitchen Dancing 101 class ;D

      Reply
      • Jordan says

        May 2, 2017 at 2:22 pm

        LOL!

        Reply
  3. Jessica says

    May 1, 2017 at 7:28 pm

    Seriously, girl! I love what you share here and I often wish I could give you a great big hug! You’re posts always remind me that we, as mothers, are in this together and you inspire me to find grace in my own journey. It’s hard. So, so hard. But your words have a way of giving me a positive outlook when the going gets tough. *hugs*

    Reply
    • Maggie Whitley says

      May 2, 2017 at 1:24 pm

      Thank you, Jessica :) I’m inspired by your comments!!! Thanks for taking the time to write them! :)

      Reply
  4. Emma Krenzke says

    May 1, 2017 at 8:36 pm

    Beautiful. Your words always resound so deeply with me. I have been reading your blog for 5 years (wow?!) and even know I rarely (never) comment, please know every time you post I think – yay!

    Reply
    • Maggie Whitley says

      May 2, 2017 at 1:25 pm

      My goodness, that is a long time :) So glad you’ve stuck around. Since you’re a long-time reader and we’re both mothers, if you have any feedback or topic suggestions I’d love to hear them! ♥

      Reply

Trackbacks

  1. 5 things our family relies on / thrives on! says:
    June 7, 2017 at 7:00 am

    […] I think it’s important we ask WHY, especially with things that aren’t working well, and most especially with things that we do “just because that’s the way we’ve always done them.” Like with the dryer sheets! I bet if you peeled back one of your processes or mindsets, if you dug a little deeper and looked for the healthier option, you’d find a better/easier/smarter way to do things. Every time I ask WHY I’m infinitely encouraged and affirmed. (Just like I wrote here.) […]

    Reply

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ABOUT MAGGIE WHITLEY DESIGNS:
Since 2008, I've been writing to inspire myself
(and others) to keep chasing the adventure of life. Whether that be through my faith in God, simple living, motherhood, handmade business, or friendship, there is much joy to be found!
My husband and I live in the Detroit area with
our THREE young children. We are adventure seekers, passion chasers, and believe inspiration is all around you. READ MORE...
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